Five o’clock yesterday morning, I was up and working on my Christmas treasures, cleaning the house and girding my loins for my drive down to the surgeon’s in Charlotte.
It might not sound like that would be a white knuckle experience, but that is only if you haven’t tried to drive from Clover to downtown Charlotte at rush hour. Add to that, a driver that gets her inner and out and north and south loops and criss-crosses confused, and you have someone doing the butt-cheek-tighten-up.
I put on an outfit that might not weigh as much as my jeans and sweater ensemble, as I knew I would get weighed. Oh, this is nothing compared to when I was pregnant and had to go to the doctor. I would make those appointments in the morning and wouldn’t eat or drink anything prior. I would just about take everything off before I stepped on the scale and jiggle my feet around to the place that showed the lowest number.
But those days are gone. Now, I pretty much just wear what I wear, clod-hoppers and all, and step on the scale and close my eyes.
Yesterday was different. I have not weighed myself since beginning to eat right, two months ago. This is the first time I have tried to lose weight where I didn’t hop on the scale each morning and let the outcome be apparent in my mood.
Nope … this time, I am doing it to get healthy, feel better and live the life I want … not to look great in a size, whatever.
But I was a tad curious. So, I faced the music and asked the nurse what I weighed the visit two months ago, when I was told I had a fatty liver and an obscene gall bladder. I also actually looked at the scale. So I did the math.
Oh, but prior to that, the nurse took my blood pressure. It was the lowest it has been in years! I was so excited. Normally numbers are a pain in my drain because I just don’t like math, but this time, the numbers were my friend.
Cutting to the chase, I am good to go. It will be a while longer before my innards figure the new normal out, but the surgeon thought I was doing phenomenally well.
Last time I was there, in September, I shuffled out of there, like my destiny had called and I didn’t like what part of the jungle I was sent to. Fatty liver. Obese. Old. Sedentary. Life was on the downturn.
Yesterday? I bopped out of there with a sturdy stride and some be-bop in my step. Yes, I was pleased with myself. But more than that, I thought about what a dear friend had told me at the beginning of the gall bladder escapade. “Your gall bladder might have saved your life.”
It may sound weird to you, those of you who haven’t struggled with weight, that this is the first time in my life that something so simple as deciding what to put in your mouth and how much, should be such an issue, but for me, it has been. Yo-yo in size. A victim of my own self.
It has been a factor in what I have done in my life. I have an energetic mind that wanted to do so much, but eating too much and eating the wrong foods, thwarted my hopes and dreams. It also makes you angry at yourself.
But lucky lasagna, I loved to eat. And there is nothing wrong with that. But when you eat to stuff more than your stomach, you have a problem. And that, my friends, was me.
There is also a lot of misinformation about diet and what is good to eat and how your body works. And it took a kind, bright, surgeon, to gently tell me that there was another way.
Yesterday, I told her how she changed my life.
I think it is important to tell people such things.
The day continued with its business. I made my daily trip to Michael’s and worked on another tree. Is there a group for tree addiction? Then I cleaned the house more and got it ready for one of our daughters, who came to visit.
The gift of life is something I often have taken for granted. The bargains I have made with God to give me another chance, have been abused on my part. But right now, I feel like I have a chance. I can choose to eat myself to death or eat to live, enjoy food but don’t over-indulge. I am and always will be a work-in-progress.
And right now, I AM the Queen of Little Trees!
Remember, there is always hope. If I can find it, so can you.